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The Gift of ME

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to YOU! 

Happy Birthday to ME! 

I am so happy to be alive to celebrate the many achievements I’ve had over the years. First, a moment of transparency: I didn’t give any Christmas gifts this year.

From where I sit, I AM the GIFT.

I have given my friendship, loyalty, knowledge, encouragement throughout this year to others, without expecting anything in return and often without any reciprocation from the receivers. I have invested my own personal funds to provide opportunities and programming for the community in which I reside. I have volunteered my talents. I have given of my time and had it wasted, and I consider my time to be very valuable. I have done a great deal more and sometimes I haven’t even been told ‘thank you‘. In spite of whatever I did or didn’t receive in return, I keep doing for others because I believe in being a blessing to someone else, because I have been blessed. Even those who have been ignored by me were being given the Gift of ME.

As a society, we have gotten so accustomed to working hard all year-long just to put ourselves in debt to make other people happy, that we have lost so much of the meaning of Christmas in the process. Yes, it’s nice to give, but you shouldn’t feel obligated to give on one day a year. If you give of yourself throughout the year to others, whether you know them personally or not, you have done well. I have literally watched people operate under pressure as if they absolutely must buy someone in particular a gift and it must be wrapped and in their hands on Christmas day or the world will come to a screeching halt. I refuse to live my life that way. Anyone who doesn’t appreciate the Gift of ME, doesn’t have to be bothered with me. To me, it’s really that simple.

When you decide that you’re not going to spend your hard earned money for the sole purpose of making others happy, a few things will happen:

1. You’ll have more money 

2. You’ll find out who your true friends and loved ones are

3. Because of 1 and 2 you’ll have less stress in your life 

4. Because of 3 you’ll be happier and healthier

You’re more than welcome to continue to brave the malls and stores throughout the month of December in an effort to get the best deals, if that is what you want to do. I actually have some investments in those stores, so I thank you in advance for your contribution to my dividends. However, before Christmas comes in 2014, I encourage you to examine more closely WHY you spend the money on the gifts you buy and the people you buy them for. If the purpose is to say ‘thank you’ to someone, there are cards for that and I’ve heard some people are very partial to hearing the words. If the purpose is to impress others, please understand that they may not be impressed or like you because you bought them something anyway. If the purpose is to make yourself feel good, you won’t be feeling so great when that credit card bill comes, or an unexpected bill comes and you don’t have the funds to pay it because you spent money on gifts to give to others.

The best gifts I ever received were items I actually needed, could use to make my life simpler, that would save me money over time, or related to an experience I wanted but might not have had the money or time to get for myself. When shopping for someone next year, keep that in mind: What do they need? What could they use to make their life better or save them time? What might help them save money over time if you buy it for them? What would they like to experience? Gifts that make people’s lives better or even saves them time could be you hiring a house or carpet cleaner for that person. A closet organizer (person or system) is also a great option. A example of product that a person can use to save money would be a drinking water filtration system for someone who buys bottled water or an at home soda machine for someone who drinks soda. I have both and they work great. I love gifts that provide an experience. A gift certificate for the movies, tickets to a play or concert tickets are thoughtful gifts because they provide an experience for a person and often don’t cost a lot of money. Your time is a great gift to give to anyone. Because we have such busy lives and so much technology at our hands, we often let time rush by us and use ‘quick’ means to communication. Calling someone instead of texting them so that you can actually have a conversation with someone is a great gift to give. It shows that you took time out for them and that they matter to you.

I’m 39 years young today. I almost didn’t make it to this age. So I’m thankful just to be here and hearing ‘Happy Birthday‘ is an awesome gift to receive for me today. Today also marks my personal countdown to my next milestone birthday in 2014 when I turn #FabLife40. I don’t want any gifts then either. I just want some of my friends and family to celebrate with me in St. Maarten. Those who can attend, will. Those who can’t attend will miss a fabulous Christmas celebration full of margaritas, palm trees and sandy beaches. Either way, next Christmas, just like this Christmas, everyone will receive the Gift of ME.

By the way, Super Woman Productions and Publishing is the official Media Sponsor for Finding My Way Home on Saturday, February 15, 2014 at Royal Oak Library.

What I Learned About Myself From Dealing With My Critics

Don’t let people determine your worth based solely on their experiences or lack thereof.

Don’t let people make you feel like you need to compete with them.

Even before I was ever called Super Woman, there were always people who felt like they could tear me down with their own insecurities. They would try to damage my self-esteem, determine my value, tell me what I couldn’t do and what I’d never do. I thank God for the strength and empowering words and gifts from my grandparents that were instilled in me so deeply that I never fell too deep into what other people thought of me or wished of me, that I couldn’t come back to the surface. Even to this day, people still try it. I’ve had people smile in my face and lie on me behind my back. I’ve had people try to associate with me to improve their own self-worth and when their plans failed, they tried to curse me in the name of God. I couldn’t make this up if I wanted to.

People  claim they don’t like The FabLife Radio Show. But they don’t have a radio show, never had one and wouldn’t know what to do with one if they did. I don’t care, as long as people continue listen. Them listening to a show they claim they don’t like is giving me ratings (smile). If they don’t listen, I don’t care about their opinion because I know that it comes from a place of prejudice. I’ve had over 50 celebrity and subject matter experts just in the first year of broadcasting the show. We constantly have people email us requesting to be guests on the show. I must be doing something right.

People claim they don’t like FabLife Apparel and Accessories, yet they’ve never seen it. They try to say it’s never going to sale and no one is going to buy it. Well people have bought it, even before a single print ad or commercial has been seen publicly. Those people bought it because they like what it stands for and when they wear their shirts, they wear them proudly. Now when the doubters and haters see a celebrity walk down the street wearing one, they will all will want one, too. That will be coming soon.

Some people don’t believe in me. Some people dislike me and yet they have never met me. Many of you have the same experiences on a daily basis; at work, at school, even from relatives. Being a public figure doesn’t change that, it just exacerbates it because it’s thousands more people looking at you everyday. That in part is why I’m not too quick to be in public all the time. I never wanted to be a celebrity and I’m not keen on that word being used to describe me. I’m intelligent enough to know that I can only control that to a certain degree. The more successful I become, the more likely the word “celebrity” is going to be used to describe me. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what people call me, as long as they have the respect enough to spell my name right.

I realized awhile back that many of my experiences growing up and in the first 20 years of my adult life were a form of boot camp to prepare me for what I deal with now and will deal with as the Super Woman Brand grows. My own ambitious nature will not allow me to ever stop striving to be successful and help others. Therefore, I needed to have a coat of armor to protect me from what the world likes to dish out. As much as there are some things about my changing lifestyle I don’t much want to deal with or have caused inconveniences, I realize they are necessary. At least I didn’t wake up in the lifestyle completely unprepared and naive to it. I was gradually introduced to it and educated it on by those with more experience than myself. I was able to observe it from a realistic standpoint for a number of years before it because a part of my day-to-day experiences. I didn’t ask for any of it, but it’s the Master’s Plan for my life. If I try to fight it, I will only lose. If I embrace it, I will always be happy.

While others are doubting me, lying on me, trying to discourage others from supporting me, opportunities are getting bigger and better. The Super Woman Brand is embarking on a publishing project that will allow writers in Detroit to become published in early 2014. We’ve entered into a business relationship with Live Nation, the largest concert and venue promotion company in the entire world. We’re going to travel to other states and broadcast The FabLife Radio Show while there. We’re shooting commercials and print ads for FabLife Apparel and Accessories. We’re sponsoring and producing events in early 2014. We’re expanding our business services and our national reach. We’ve already lined up our signature events for 2014, including our official International Women’s Day event in March, our I Feel Good! Mind, Body and Soul Women’s Conference in August and so much more that I get dizzy trying to remember it all.

This year I was awarded the 2013 Confident Woman Award, I was recognized in the seventh edition of Who’s Who in Black Detroit. These acknowledgements indicate that I’m doing something right. While other organizations and publications honor and acknowledge the same people year after year after year, it is the smaller publications that I respect and appreciate most because they are the ones that take the time to actually seek people others may not know about yet, who are doing great things in the world. Like yours truly. This year for the first time I went from inside the pages of magazines, to being on the cover of one; Detroit CEO Magazine’s first print edition includes myself, Lacretia Rogers and Mahogany Mignon. If by chance you don’t know who they are, I encourage you to research them further. The magazine will be available to buy soon and details about the event will be shared with Super Fans.

I don’t do what I do for “likes”, I do what I do because I love it. My work fulfills me as an individual, it heightens my purpose in this world. I don’t have to compete with anyone. I am my only competition. My goal is to be better each day than I was the day before. No one can diminish that, make me doubt myself for that, make me quit or make my hurt, because I choose to live my life with purpose. It may be a purpose they don’t like or understand, but that is not my concern or problem to solve. Those who have been supportive of me for the last five years will still be five, ten or fifty years from now for the same reasons.

What happened to all of the people who tried to damage my self-esteem, determine my value, tell me what I couldn’t do and what I’d never do?

Some of them are dead, some of them are still poor, some of them still haven’t done anything with their own lives, some of them are miserable.

Had those people spent more time improving themselves, reaching their goals, competing with themselves instead of criticizing others, they too, could have accomplished much more. Life is too short to concentrate on others more than you concentrate on yourself. Life is too short to spend it talking about others and not reaching for your personal greatness.

 

A Disturbance In The Force

It always amazes me how you can know a person for a very long time, then wake up one day and realize that you barely know them at all. Then there are the people who, no matter how much time or distance is between you and them, they ALWAYS know when something isn’t right with you or in your world. During those instances when someone or something has disrupted my flow or thrown something in my life out of balance, even slightly, Super Son will say “I sense a disturbance in the Force“, which for those of you familiar with Star Wars (1977), you know that is in reference to a classic line said by Obi Wan Kenobi. It may be my body language, my tone of voice or my overall mood he’s picking up on, but he’s rarely incorrect. Right now, there is definitely a disturbance in the Force.

Everyone has a least one person with the innate ability to access when you’re not 100% yourself or at your best. Everyone has that one person who is in tune with them to the degree that they can easily sense a disturbance in your Force. Whether you had a hard day at work, encountered a difficult person in the grocery store (it can’t just be me) or had a disagreement with someone you love. That ability is also referred to as empathy. It is completely natural, but not often utilized in our society because we’re often too self-centered to notice what others may be dealing with.

Lack of empathy is why some people are so quick to say that people should “get over” the verdict in the Zimmerman trial, because it wasn’t their child that was murdered. Lack of empathy is why some people are able to watch an elderly man being brutally beaten at a gas station and not make any attempt to help him or even dial 911. Lack of empathy is why some people don’t have any respect for human life. Until…they become a victim and want someone to help them.

Being empathetic towards others doesn’t make a person appear weak. If anything we have the capacity for empathy because it makes us stronger. Being able to put yourself in someone else’s shoes for a brief period of time, can actually help you to make better decisions for yourself longterm. Knowing, even through empathy, what it is like to lose a child, a spouse or a parent can improve how you deal with others in a similar situation. Knowing, even through empathy, what it is like to have cancer, depression, dementia or even a broken heart, can help you to help others, and yourself, in the same or similar situation. Knowing, even briefly through empathy, someone else’s struggle, pain or tragedy makes for a more compassionate and understanding human being and human experience. I think we could all use a little more empathy in our lives.

This disturbance in the Force that I’m experiencing will soon be resolved and I’ll be back to my normal. Nothing lasts forever and I’m very resilient. Plus I have a lot of positive distractions I can focus my energy on. But now I know what this feels like and so does Super Son. Now, if a day ever comes and he goes through a similar experience, he will likely have this time to reference back to in order to help him through his disturbance. And may the Force be with him.

 

 

 

 

If We Didn’t Stop Growing, We’d All Be Giants

When human beings reach adult maturation, we eventually stop growing taller. As a result, we remain whatever height we are at that time, for the remainder of our adult lives. People are different heights due to their DNA. Regardless of how you think man came to exist here, one thing is true: There had to be an off switch for growth, otherwise we all would be giants.

Sadly some of us also have an off switch when it comes to realizing our potential. We put limitations on ourselves and our way of thinking which stifles our personal growth. We make excuses for not exceeding mediocrity. We blame others for our failures. We don’t take personal responsibility for the direction our lives are going in. We limit ourselves. We stop growing. Regardless of our physical limitations, there shouldn’t be limitations placed on our other abilities. Instead of “I can’t”, more of us should learn to say “I will”.

What hinders you most? Is it what you think of yourself or do you absorb the negativity that others think of you? Is it easier for you to be mediocre than great? Is greatness too much responsibility for you to handle? Understand what I mean by greatness. Greatness isn’t the same as being rich, being a celebrity or even being the boss. Greatness is taking whatever God-given abilities and talents you have and using them completely and without apology to be the best at whatever it is that you do. I don’t care if you sweep floors, greatness is doing your personal best at sweeping those floors.

There’s a lot to be said for putting forth a little effort. Almost every idea I’ve had thus far has come to fruition. I’ve discovered that when I take one step towards making an idea a reality, everything I need to continue comes to me; the people, the connections, the resources and the money. Even when I’m down to the last few dollars I have to invest in the idea, something happens that makes those last few dollars feel like a million dollars. Remember this: everything I’ve done during the last five years that I have been in business has been financed completely by me. I’ve never had a bank loan or financial investor in any of my business endeavors, and I’m still here. Yes, I’ve taken some minor losses, but they haven’t been anything I couldn’t claim as a business expense. I’ve never had to sacrifice the roof over my head or use anything I own as collateral. I haven’t had to visit a single pawn shop or sell anything that I hold dear. That is all because I don’t stop trying. Even if I fail, I take the experience as a lesson and try to do it again but a lot better the next time around, OR I acknowledge that particular endeavor just may not be the right fit for the Super Woman Brand and I set it aside with grace and move on to the next project.

I believe I’m bigger than any of my so-called failures. I believe that every opportunity that comes my way will be something I can touch one day. Maybe not today, but one day. Provided that I continue to take small steps towards it. I know that there are a lot of naysayers who don’t believe in me or anything I do. There are also a lot of doubters and people wishing for my demise with every breath they take. I could care less. I don’t do anything that I do to please those people. I don’t live for those people. I don’t work for those people. They are not my competition, not will they deter me from my goals. Everyone isn’t going to want to ride in my life’s boat with me. Not even when it becomes a beautiful yacht. I don’t even waste time inviting everyone to come aboard. Some people aren’t worthy and if they are included, they will only try to push me overboard off of my own life’s boat. Those people who are worthy will be put in the proper time and place for us to meet. How do I know that? Because it happens almost everyday.

I refuse to let anything or anyone stunt my growth. Growth is more important than money to me. Growth adds value to a person’s life that money could never do. Yes, being a profitable business is important. But also doing something to inspire others to reach their full potential is equally important to me. I don’t have the time to personally mentor everyone who asks, although I wish I did. Many people have unfortunately declined opportunities with me that would have inevitably helped them in the long-term. I learned that can’t give forth thought to short-sighted people so I don’t waste my time trying and I don’t let it upset me. I just continue to move forward with my own goals and show by example what can happen when you make a decision and stick to it.

When I was a child I nearly towered over everyone I went to school with. Occasionally there would be one or two other girls taller than me that would distract people from staring up at me and saying “WOW! How tall ARE you?!?!?

Now, as an adult at 5’10” tall, I still  get that question and I still tower over many people, even ones who are physically taller than I am, simply because I strive to continue to grow.

I strive to grow in my industry.

I strive to grow in my business.

I strive to grow in my community.

I strive to grow my bank account.

I strive to grow my employees.

I strive to grow my network.

I strive to grow my influence.

I strive to growth my value.

And I will continue growing until I become a GIANT

 

♦Super Woman is showing other women how to become a GIANT. Attend or Sponsor the upcoming I Feel Good! Mind, Body and Soul Women’s Conference © Sponsored by Wayne State University on August 17, 2013 at Wayne State University. 

Happy New Prosperous Year!

It’s a new year, full of new possibilities! 

2012 resulted in a lot of growth for me personally, professionally and for the Super Woman Brand. Change is good, but it isn’t always easy. I’m finally at a place where I can actually see things coming together. And it’s a beautiful sight to behold. If nothing else, I’ve learned a lot about patience and the rewards that come about from being more patient.

In 2012 I had to make a lot of hard decisions also. More proof that change isn’t always easy. Letting go and letting God work in your life can be very challenging. I stepped deeper into my faith and learned how to walk in it more as well. I don’t let people deter me or determine me with their own personal agendas. And many people have tried…and failed.

In 2012 I had to cut a lot of people from my life. Well, honestly it wasn’t always me. Most of the time it was God weeding my garden and taking out the trash when He was done. Everyone isn’t meant to reap the benefits of my work, my creativity or the life that the Master’s Plan is resulting in. God made sure they left and that they are not missed. Some people who were cut off before 2012 tried to come back in 2012. They learned that they were no longer welcome in my Super World.

I ended 2012 on a very high note. And this is just the beginning!

2013 has so much to offer. The FabLife Radio Show is doing very well and will improve tremendously going into the new year. We have new guests scheduled and returning guests who enjoyed being on the show from 2012. I’m preparing to fully launch FabLife Apparel and Accessories in 2013. The Official Super Woman YouTube Channel will be home of new digital video content. I suggest that you subscribe so that you’ll receive information as its posted online. I’m increasing my workforce to allow young people to gain experience in their fields of study. It has taken almost a year to find the best of the best, but it has been well worth it. Many additional opportunities have presented themselves in my career for 2013 and are in negotiations. As all of my plans become finalized Super Fans will be the first to know.

Some of my new opportunities are a result of my 2012 goals that were set and worked on by my Super Manager and I. So they didn’t just fall out of the sky like Kryptonite and they aren’t just because I’m cute. They were a part of a plan. Proof that proper planning produces prosperity.

As I begin my 2013 with a very long list of goals to accomplish and many already near completion, I hope that you will also set goals for yourself. When setting your goals, make sure that you are patient with yourself and the processes. Everything doesn’t happen overnight or by magic for everyone. People who have it the easiest often don’t last long and lack true substance. That is true for everything from weight loss to increasing your earning potential. In anything you do, you want to strive for longevity. Longevity takes planning, productivity, prayer and patience. Those are just a few of the requirements, not all of them.

Happy New Prosperous Year, Super Fans! Let’s make 2013 Fabulous! 

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What If Justice Wasn’t Blind?

Michael David Dunn

257 Ocean Residence Ct

Satellite Beach, FL 32937

 

Dear Michael,

What if instead of justice being blind, it was an eye for an eye? What if the system that you hide behind said that because you took a life, you had to give one equal to it other than your own? What if because you killed Jordan and shot at his friends, any of us other mothers and fathers across this country could come to your house and kill your child and shoot at your family? How would that make you feel?

I ask because it doesn’t matter that Jordan and his friends were young Black men. It doesn’t matter that you are white and apparently become violent after you drink. All that matters is that you thought you had the right to kill someone else for no reason. Music isn’t a weapon aimed at you. There was no gun in the car. None of the teenagers had a gun on their person. In fact, the only person wielding a weapon that day was YOU. YOU who thinks you have the right to police everyone else’s taste in music, actions and whereabouts. Yet you don’t have any self-discipline to police yourself. YOU, the coward, who thinks he can kill young Black men because you think they are beneath you. You, who thinks lying about feeling threatened will get you acquitted. You are an ignorant, prejudiced, homicidal maniac, who has absolutely no respect for human life.

You had just witnessed your son get married. Were you not happy about that occasion? Was it really necessary for you to leave a day of celebration and make someone else’s life a day of tragedy? You are a piece of trash. Not because I say so; but because your actions and excuses for them make you so. If someone had walked into your son’s wedding, just hours prior, and decided to shoot him because they didn’t like the wedding music he had elected to play, how would that have made you feel?

These are the things you need to consider while you spend the rest of your life in prison. I also want you to know that as a mother of a young Black man, had that been my son you killed, you’d already be dead.  I believe in an eye for an eye. Be thankful you get to remain breathing for a moment, Michael. I hope the state of Florida ends that soon and sentences you to execution along with the other 401 prisoners on the list. That probably won’t happen though, because it seems that the only people who are executed quickly and without remorse in Florida are young Black men, and you don’t fit the criteria.

I pray that if you and your buddy, George Zimmerman (with whom you apparently share the same hobby of killing innocent people), don’t get the execution you greatly deserve, that in exchange the two of you spend the rest of your lives getting raped in prison. The two of you aren’t what we would call “real” killers, so you won’t be able to handle what they do to you in there. No punishment handed down is powerful enough to bring Jordan and Trayvon back to their parents, but maybe it will make you appreciate human life a lot more before you die.  

 

Sincerely,

A mother of a young Black man and a citizen of the United States of America demanding justice

~ The “Stand Your Ground” law is a racist and prejudiced device used in Florida to kill us, not protect us. It is unequally applied at the whim of the judges and prosecutors. A Black woman, Marissa Alexander, was sentenced to prison for 20 years in 2012, for shooting a warning shot into a wall because her physically abusive husband attacked her. Yet, Michael Dunn and George Zimmerman both killed young Black men, who were minding their own business in public, not abusing anyone or committing any felonies in the process during the same year (2012) using the same exact defense. This is Michael Dunn’s real home address.