Tag Archives: gifts

My #FabLife40th Birthday

This is a monumental year for me. As I mentioned in an earlier post this year, I’m celebrating my #FabLife40th birthday this year! I’m celebrating the entire year by doing two things: by being a blessing to others and building upon what I’ve already started with the Super Woman Brand. In lieu of accepting gifts for my #FabLife40th birthday, I’m asking Super Fans to support two nonprofit organizations by giving a donation of $20 each for a total of $40 to commemorate the 40 years of my life.

If you’re new to my life story, you may not know that each year that I’ve celebrated my birthday is very special to me since my 30th birthday. I don’t need to celebrate with a party or cake and ice cream. I don’t need a lot of people around me or a lot of gifts either. I celebrate my birthday by setting attainable personal and professional goals. My birthday is also very special to me because I was diagnosed with a chronic illness when I was 26 and told that I could die by the age of 30. So turning 40 is quite an accomplishment for me and my health has tremendously improved. I feel blessed to breathe everyday. There are two times in my life that mean a great deal to me. When I was a child and looking forward to becoming a senior adult. That is why I’m a board member for two specific organizations. Real Life. My Music is a nonprofit organization in Detroit that provides after school programs in arts, dance and music for school aged children, while St. Patrick’s Senior Center is a nonprofit organization in Detroit that provides services and programs for senior adults.

When I was a child I was very blessed and fortunate to have opportunities to formally study dance and music. Not all children have those opportunities now. Real Life. My Music helps to bridge that gap so that we can have a generation of well-rounded children who become well-rounded adults. As I get older, I hope to have access to the services and programs provided by St. Patrick’s Senior Center so that I can have an active life in my golden years. That is why I selected these two organizations to support.

Therefore, in honor of my milestone #FabLife40th birthday, I’d like those who support me, to support the organizations I donate my time and resources to.  It’s just that simple. No gifts. No gift cards. Just a $20 donation to each organization anytime between now and December 31, 2014. That’s all I want from my Super Fans for my #FabLife40th birthday.

This is also just one of the many ways I plan to bless others during this year, along with the upcoming events, I Feel Good! Mind, Body and Soul Women’s Conference in August, Detroit Women In the Arts Wikipedia Edit-Athon in October and my summer release of “Breaking Through the Black Ceiling” with a portion of sales being donated to Karmanos Cancer Institute in honor of Mark England.

I appreciate you in advance for supporting initiatives that are much needed in Metro Detroit for our children, senior adults and our community.

Smooches! 

~Super Woman 

 

To make a $20 donation to St. Patrick’s Senior Center click here. 

To make a $20 donation to Real Life. My Music click here. 

To support upcoming Super Events, please contact us using the Contact Us form here.

 

The Gift of ME

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to YOU! 

Happy Birthday to ME! 

I am so happy to be alive to celebrate the many achievements I’ve had over the years. First, a moment of transparency: I didn’t give any Christmas gifts this year.

From where I sit, I AM the GIFT.

I have given my friendship, loyalty, knowledge, encouragement throughout this year to others, without expecting anything in return and often without any reciprocation from the receivers. I have invested my own personal funds to provide opportunities and programming for the community in which I reside. I have volunteered my talents. I have given of my time and had it wasted, and I consider my time to be very valuable. I have done a great deal more and sometimes I haven’t even been told ‘thank you‘. In spite of whatever I did or didn’t receive in return, I keep doing for others because I believe in being a blessing to someone else, because I have been blessed. Even those who have been ignored by me were being given the Gift of ME.

As a society, we have gotten so accustomed to working hard all year-long just to put ourselves in debt to make other people happy, that we have lost so much of the meaning of Christmas in the process. Yes, it’s nice to give, but you shouldn’t feel obligated to give on one day a year. If you give of yourself throughout the year to others, whether you know them personally or not, you have done well. I have literally watched people operate under pressure as if they absolutely must buy someone in particular a gift and it must be wrapped and in their hands on Christmas day or the world will come to a screeching halt. I refuse to live my life that way. Anyone who doesn’t appreciate the Gift of ME, doesn’t have to be bothered with me. To me, it’s really that simple.

When you decide that you’re not going to spend your hard earned money for the sole purpose of making others happy, a few things will happen:

1. You’ll have more money 

2. You’ll find out who your true friends and loved ones are

3. Because of 1 and 2 you’ll have less stress in your life 

4. Because of 3 you’ll be happier and healthier

You’re more than welcome to continue to brave the malls and stores throughout the month of December in an effort to get the best deals, if that is what you want to do. I actually have some investments in those stores, so I thank you in advance for your contribution to my dividends. However, before Christmas comes in 2014, I encourage you to examine more closely WHY you spend the money on the gifts you buy and the people you buy them for. If the purpose is to say ‘thank you’ to someone, there are cards for that and I’ve heard some people are very partial to hearing the words. If the purpose is to impress others, please understand that they may not be impressed or like you because you bought them something anyway. If the purpose is to make yourself feel good, you won’t be feeling so great when that credit card bill comes, or an unexpected bill comes and you don’t have the funds to pay it because you spent money on gifts to give to others.

The best gifts I ever received were items I actually needed, could use to make my life simpler, that would save me money over time, or related to an experience I wanted but might not have had the money or time to get for myself. When shopping for someone next year, keep that in mind: What do they need? What could they use to make their life better or save them time? What might help them save money over time if you buy it for them? What would they like to experience? Gifts that make people’s lives better or even saves them time could be you hiring a house or carpet cleaner for that person. A closet organizer (person or system) is also a great option. A example of product that a person can use to save money would be a drinking water filtration system for someone who buys bottled water or an at home soda machine for someone who drinks soda. I have both and they work great. I love gifts that provide an experience. A gift certificate for the movies, tickets to a play or concert tickets are thoughtful gifts because they provide an experience for a person and often don’t cost a lot of money. Your time is a great gift to give to anyone. Because we have such busy lives and so much technology at our hands, we often let time rush by us and use ‘quick’ means to communication. Calling someone instead of texting them so that you can actually have a conversation with someone is a great gift to give. It shows that you took time out for them and that they matter to you.

I’m 39 years young today. I almost didn’t make it to this age. So I’m thankful just to be here and hearing ‘Happy Birthday‘ is an awesome gift to receive for me today. Today also marks my personal countdown to my next milestone birthday in 2014 when I turn #FabLife40. I don’t want any gifts then either. I just want some of my friends and family to celebrate with me in St. Maarten. Those who can attend, will. Those who can’t attend will miss a fabulous Christmas celebration full of margaritas, palm trees and sandy beaches. Either way, next Christmas, just like this Christmas, everyone will receive the Gift of ME.

By the way, Super Woman Productions and Publishing is the official Media Sponsor for Finding My Way Home on Saturday, February 15, 2014 at Royal Oak Library.

Valentine’s Day…The Don’ts

I’ve been single for a while now, so there are some things I don’t do traditionally. I don’t wait for men to buy me diamonds. I don’t wait on men to take me on trips and I don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day. In my past relationships, I either had really beautiful, romantic Valentine’s Days or really horrible, ‘I’m breaking up with you after this’  Valentine’s Days. Therefore, with Valentine’s Day approaching, I wanted to share some DON’Ts that I learned over the last 20 years. This is for men and women, married couples and single people. It is to be taken with a grain of salt because everything ain’t for everybody. However, even if you disagree with the DON’Ts, they are something to consider, particularly if you’re always puzzled about the lack of romance in your relationship.

If you DON’T call, date, ask out or have interest in someone throughout the year, DON’T post Valentine’s Day greetings, pictures of flowers, candy, teddy bears, kisses, or jewelry on their Facebook wall, Twitter or send by text message. This is NOT sexy, NOT romantic and if you’re over 18 years old, NOT mature. Instead, try the REAL thing. If the person isn’t important enough for you to spend the money, don’t waste the time it takes to sign on to the computer and go to their Facebook or Twitter, or go to your phone and send the text in the first place. That is not genuinely romantic.

If you give a gift, DON’T expect to receive sex from the recipient in return. All gifts should be given based on what you think the person is worth, what the person likes and from your heart. Expecting sex in return cheapens the gift and the gesture. It doesn’t matter if the gift was the $1 million Victoria’s Secret bra or an Aston Martin. Give the gift because you wanted to.

DON’T believe that you can give an intangible gift for Valentine’s Day and that it should be appreciated by the recipient because it’s “the thought that counts“. The other person is thinking that you’re a selfish, cheap ass.

DON’T give a person something they give themselves all the time. Although it is beautiful to pay attention to what a person likes, if they treat themselves to a movie every week, taking them to the movies for Valentine’s Day is not going to earn you any cupid points.

DON’T forget the phone number to 1-800-FLOWERS. Unless someone specifically doesn’t like flowers (I know some women who don’t), this is a good number for any man who is truly a romantic at heart to have and keep stored in his phone. And guess what? They have other things besides flowers now. So if you’re a woman or your sweetie happens to have allergies or just doesn’t like roses, you can find something else there that they may like.

DON’T forget to think about what a person truly likes. If someone is an avid reader of a particular author (like Super Woman for instance), they might really appreciate the current or next book released by that author – autographed. If a person loves a particular music group, get them concert tickets or a gift card to a venue where that group is going to perform that year. This is called planning and preparation and requires paying attention to the person that you’re with. Procrastinators will have the hardest time pulling this off. They will be the ones buying big bags of candy and single roses on the street corners on February 14th.

DON’T buy big bags of candy and single roses on the street corner on February 14th. The nicest candy gift I ever received was from a guy who didn’t have Godiva Chocolatier money, but he knew that I liked colorful, assorted M&Ms, chocolate covered nuts and Raisinets. He mixed them all up in a decorative jar with a cap so that I could enjoy them at my leisure. I ate all the candy eventually, and I still have the jar.

DON’T be insensitive in your gift giving. Sometimes people are dealing this issues that no romantic gesture can solve. If a person is having a difficult time financially, and they’ve expressed it, but you give them a gift that is valued at the approximate amount of money they needed to resolve, or ease, their financial difficulty, they will probably look at you like you’re crazy because you could have just given them the cash instead. So consider the person’s needs versus trying to impress them needlessly when giving a gift. This is a good principle all year round, not just on Valentine’s Day.

DON’T overlook obvious gift possibilities. If the person has a favorite dish that they rarely have the opportunity to enjoy, and you’re a pretty good cook, or there’s a restaurant in your area that is known to serve that dish, there’s your Valentine’s Day gift! If a person is über busy and complains about not having time to get certain things done, find a service that will accommodate them or help them personally to get that task completed. DUH! Some people are simple to please but in our efforts to impress them, we over think the simplest gestures that will put a smile on their face.

DON’T give a gift that will result in additional work for the recipient. Avoid buying your girlfriend a dog if she’s never at home or travels for work. Who’s going to feed and walk Snookums? Plus, if the relationship ends, you’ll be on Judge Judy fighting over who gets to keep Snookums.

DON’T wait until the last-minute. People can tell when you didn’t put any thought or feeling into your gift and you bought the gift on the street corner that same day. You lose cupid points immediately for “forgetting” because it means that it wasn’t important enough for you to remember.

DON’T forget about the gifts that people will remember most. Sometimes people want to feel appreciated more than anything else. If you have an interest in someone or have feelings towards them, try expressing that – verbally. Cards are nice, but unless you made the card and it contains your original words and feelings or poetry inside, that card will be thrown away eventually. However, people always remember kind words and heartfelt sentiments. So tell someone what they mean to you and how you feel about them face to face. That will earn you huge cupid points and you might discover that they also have positive feelings towards you.

DON’T be selfish in your giving. DON’T be surprised, angry or bitter if you don’t receive a gift in return. It really is better to give than to receive. Giving with the expectation of getting something in return is selfish. Also, it’s possible that the recipient of your gift was surprised to get something from you to begin with and therefore, they don’t have anything for you in return. Personally, as a single woman who rarely receives gifts, I’m always surprised when I do receive one and therefore, I never have anything to give in return.

DON’T forget that old school romance still works. Romance has been put on life support by technology. Texting, Facebook and Twitter have made it not only popular, but too easy to forget about doing things the right way. Real romance comes from being attentive towards the other person’s interests, hobbies, career, thoughts, feelings, habits, likes, dislikes, needs, wants and moods. One thing I find romantic is someone who is a good listener and hugger, that I can talk to, who will simply understand and support my creative, overachieving and ambitious nature.

So, this upcoming Valentine’s Day, step away from the computer, smart phone, social networking and street corner vendors, and do something different that will separate you from today’s romantically challenged norm. I even suggest that you Google “romantic gestures” and see what sparks your creativity. If you are single and you don’t have someone in your life worth the effort, or even the money, be honest with yourself about that and spend the day by yourself, loving yourself. It’s much better than “poking” someone on Facebook.

♥ Happy Valentine’s Day! ♥

Smooches