Tag Archives: challenges

Reflections On My Younger Self

I don’t think too much about my past unless a memory is triggered. That’s because I don’t believe that you can move forward in life if you’re always looking behind you hoping, wishing and praying about what you would have or could have done “only if things had been done/turned out differently”. However, I have grown to realize that my experiences have value, not just in the woman I have become, but also as a motivating factors to others.

I receive a lot of emails and messages from people who tell me something I did or said changed their lives in a positive way. I feel blessed to be a part of other people’s personal or professional growth process.  Those seemingly small gestures of gratitude from others is one of the things that keeps me motivated as well.  Knowing that I make a difference is its own reward. That is why I have intentionally made an effort to be more transparent with you, my Super Fans, about who I am as a person and some of my challenges, both professionally and personally. I hope that you enjoy this brief article written by me for another media source and feel free to share it with someone else who may benefit from it.

~ Smooches 

The Power of Self Worth 



It is said that in order to rebuild something, first you have to tear it down. I’ve been feeling that lately. Anything that can go wrong, does. Every step I take leads me into a wall. Every investment I make fails to result in a return. Or so it seems as I look out the window of my world. No one can ever tell me that God  doesn’t have a sense of humor. He laughs at me regularly. He gives me hurdles and when I jump them, He makes the next ones higher, just to see if I can jump those, too.  

I know that everyday isn’t easy. It isn’t supposed to be. Often the things worth having take the most work and are the hardest to acquire. No matter who you are, how much money you make, or where you live, there are days when you feel tested. Some days we are tested heavily, and other days, not as much. It’s the growth that comes afterwards that you can look forward to and then appreciate.

It is better not to fight the change, the challenge or the test. Embrace it. Embrace it fully and face whatever fears you have about it. When it is all done, you will be blessed, even if you can’t see it. We aren’t given tests or challenges in our lives to break us down. We are given them to build us up and make us able to face the next challenge and appreciate the blessings we receive in return. If life was easy all the time, we wouldn’t live it completely. We’d become complacent and bored. We’d become too comfortable. The challenges and the triumphs are what make living worth living.

As you are going through your challenges, don’t seclude yourself from others. Don’t reject your friends and those who care for you. When we go into hiding because we are facing adversity, others don’t see the adversity, they only feel the rejection from us. Your friends and loved ones may understand you better than you know. But if you don’t give them the chance to be in your corner, they won’t know you need them. Also, having someone to confide in helps to relieve some of the stress you feel from the test you’re facing. Holding emotions inside often creates more stress and problems in the long run. Plus, some tests aren’t tests specifically just for us. Some tests help to reveal who around you should or shouldn’t remain in your life by testing their resilience in your time of difficulty. Admitting you need help, love and support from others does not make you weak. The admission reaffirms your strength. When you are able to trust in others, you prove yourself to be trustworthy.

Going through challenges in life makes you human. Embrace your humanity.

This Woman’s Work

This woman’s work is never done.  That is why I’m Super Woman. 

I give a lot to others and I expect a lot in return.  I don’t believe in putting my name on, or behind anything or anyone that can not stand and deliver, regardless of the amount of money involved.  I believe in protecting The Brand.  The Brand will be my legacy.

I do a lot of this on my own.  I am the talent, the  publisher, the CEO, the marketing rep and the publicist.  However, I credit several aspects of making Super Woman come to life to those Super individuals I surround myself with.  They inspire me to do more and reach higher.  They also keep me on solid ground and realistic.  They protect my sanity so that I can protect The Brand.  I am the responsible party in this endeavor.  This is my work.

This woman’s work isn’t always easy.  In fact, it is often very challenging and not always rewarding.  I’ve had to eliminate people from my life because they didn’t want the best for me or because they didn’t believe in me.  I’m constantly being tested with unexpected circumstances.  This year has held several tests for me so far and it’s only February.  My car was stolen, my books were stolen as a result, which resulted in some financial pressure for my household.  I had to operate my business with less and still maintain my household.  Once that hurdle was jumped,  I was immediately faced with another unexpected financial circumstance because of human error on the part of a tax preparer from two years ago.  I managed to get that resolved within a couple of days without acting “out of pocket”.  However,  it will take up to four weeks for me to receive reimbursement.  In the meantime, I still need the money.  Today, I had a minor issue with my printer and the copies of The Goodie Bag I just received.  Hopefully, that will be resolved today, as well and without me having to act “out of pocket”.  The good news is that the event that I was supposed to present The Goodie Bag at this weekend was postponed to a later date. 

Someone I care for told me today that this woman, is being “tested”.  I fully agree.  I believe that I am being tested.  I don’t know if it is God testing my faith and resilience or if it is Satan testing my belief  in God.  Either way, I know I am being tested.  This woman’s work is a test.  Who better to be tested than Super Woman?

In retrospect, I don’t really mind the test.  I believe that everything happens for a reason.  Even the things we don’t want to happen have a purpose. I also believe that I am blessed and highly favored.  I believe that anything worth me having will take hard work and perserverance on my part.  I don’t expect this journey to be easy.  I am not naive in the expectation that life and all that it includes will ever be easy.  My life has never been easy.  I’ve been through all kinds of bumps and bruises in my life thusfar.  The beautiful thing is that bumps and bruises do heal.  Some last a little longer than others, but they heal with prayer and strength.  

Because my life hasn’t been easy, I actually expect challenges along the way.  Without those challenges I wouldn’t know how to recover.  Without those challenges, I wouldn’t know how to move forward.  Without those challenges I wouldn’t be the woman that I am today.  I wouldn’t be Super Woman.  And this woman’s work would be in vain.

So I do what I always do. I resolve the issues to the best of my ability, I ask for help resolving the issues, if necessary, and I keep it moving forward.  I don’t pity myself.  If I feel the need to cry, I cry and get it over with.  I pray over the issues and ask for God’s hand and guidance in the resolution of any challenges that I may face.  I thank God for him adjusting my life to fit His plan, so that I can achieve the greatness that I am built for.  Then I look forward to the next day… and the day after that… and the day after that.  It is in divine order for me to do this, or it wouldn’t have come to fruition.  Why do I do it? Because this woman’s work isn’t easy.  If it were easy,  everyone could do it, but everyone can’t.  So I do it.  Because it’s what I do.